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Self-talk is a habitual process we all go through. Sometimes, we talk to ourselves nicely, sometimes we don’t. I’ll be willing to bet that everyone experiences some form of negative self-talk some of the time.

If this gets out of hand, you might actually experience lower levels of productivity and energy, and possibly depression.

So in order to kick start a new habit, you need a couple of things.

#1 – what is the source of negative thinking?

If you experience the negative thought as an imaginary voice in your mind telling you that you can’t do something (such as your father/mother/boss, etc), then you might have to go one step beyond just the verbalized message. What is the reason they might say that? Perhaps they are worried for you, or that you could get hurt. By exploring their highest positive intention, you will soon get to the root of the issue and begin to diffuse the negative thought. Once you discover this, repeat in your mind “They only want me to ____” and fill that blank with their positive intent.

#2 – What replacement habit do you want?

We all know that negative thinking is a cycle of habit. If you have negative thoughts, it could be because you’ve turned it into a habit. One of my students had been trained to think negative simply because he felt it was the requirement of his job. He started by believing that he had to always think of the worst case scenario in his job as a quality assurance manager. However, this habit started to eat away at lots of other things in his life including his family, and his family members sometimes just wanted comfort and understanding, not a troubleshooter.

So eventually he learned how to differentiate the need for building a contingency for things on the job versus really listening to people.

To do this, you can frame up your experience by focusing fully on the mental context. When does negative thinking come up when it’s not useful? Now, in that context, choose specifically what you would like to think instead. I’d suggest that you pick up an NLP Practitioner program to discover the various ways to do this (you can do this by registering on the list on the top left on the blog).

#3 – Does negative thinking stop you from taking action?

A lot of my clients and students tell me that they just can’t do anything once they get into a spiral of negative thought. Here’s a simple technique I found works.

For the longest time, I had been procrastinating exercising because I would effectively talk myself out of it. Whenever I am already dressed to go for a run, I could talk myself into eating or playing a computer game. Unfortunately, this caused a lot of problems for my exercise routine. So I realized that the best way to stop procrastinating was to stop that inner voice. When we need to make a decision, an effective strategy occurs when the thing to be done is acted upon, not “thought” about. Test it out – once you have a mental trigger about what to do, use that to get into action, not talk to yourself. You’ll then find there’s no need to even eliminate negative thinking because you won’t have the mental space for it in the first place!

photo credit: djjewelz

To stop binge eating with NLP, all you have to do is to follow these steps. Do note – in order to effectively use the technique, you need several pre-requisites. Not everyone can apply the techniques well because they lack a few things:

• Sensory acuity, or the ability to observe details and maximize their senses.
• Self-suggestion, or the ability to communicate with yourself internally.
• Emotional state control, or the ability to change your emotional states effectively.

If you are unable to do these well, I’d recommend you seek out an NLP practitioner who might be able to help you.

Here’s the technique!

1. Categorize the type of food you binge eat. For instance, it could be fast food, snack food, chocolates, etc.
2. There is usually a situation or context where such binge eating takes place. For instance, you might snack whenever you watch TV but not really anywhere else. Or you might binge eat snack foods after meals. You have to identify the context where you get the feeling of wanting to binge eat.
3. Picture the context in your mind. During this time, notice the full-sensory experience of binge eating. Notice what you see, hear and feel, especially after that food goes down your stomach.
4. Clear your mind.
5. Now imagine something that is totally and absolutely disgusting for you. For instance, it might be the garbage dump or decaying meat.  Smell and taste this foul thing in your mouth (this may take some getting used to) and notice how you feel like wanting to throw up.
6. Clear your mind again.
7. Go back to #3. Picture your favorite food again and imagine yourself eating it like the first  time, noticing the level of pleasure your experience, but this time, on the next time you taste that food, notice how you chew or bite into it and it opens up the sensation of something absolute foul-tasting, as in #5.
8. Do this about 4-7 times  (if you feel really sick the first time around, you can go to the next step).
9. Clear your mind.
10. Test by imagining your binge-eating-food in your mind. Does it bring back the same desire? By this stage, you would have successfully disconnected the automatic behavior of binge eating.

For instance, many doubt the existence of repetitive cognitive associations in an NLP process like the Swish Pattern. However, based on concepts in neuroplasticity and Hebbian Theory:

The adult brain is not “hard-wired” with fixed and immutable neuronal circuits. There are many instances of cortical and subcortical rewiring of neuronal circuits in response to training as well as in response to injury. There is solid evidence that neurogenesis, the formation of new nerve cells, occurs in the adult, mammalian brain—and such changes can persist well into old age.^[3] The evidence for neurogenesis is mainly restricted to the hippocampus and olfactory bulb, but current research has revealed that other parts of the brain, including the cerebellum, may be involved as well^[5].

Using the theoretical basis that has already been researched, NLP tests to see how these processes work with humans.

photo credit: neurollero

In 1929, Hans Berger discovered that the mind exhibits continuous electrical activity and cast doubt on the Pavlovian model of perception and response because, now, there appeared to be something going on in the brain even without much stimulus.

At the same time, there were many mysteries. For example, if there was a method for the brain to recognize a circle, how does it recognize circles of various sizes or imperfect roundness? To accommodate every single possible circle that could exist, the brain would need a far greater capacity than it has.

Another theory, the Gestalt theory, stated that signals to the brain established a sort of field. The form of this field depended only on the pattern of the inputs, but it still could not explain how this field was understood by the mind.

The behaviorist theories at the time did well at explaining how the processing of patterns happened. However, they could not account for how these patterns made it into the mind.

Hebb combined up-to-date data about behavior and the mind into a single theory. And, while the understanding of the anatomy of the brain did not advance much since the development of the older theories on the operation of the brain, he was still able to piece together a theory that got a lot of the important functions of the brain right.

His theory became known as Hebbian theory and the models which follow this theory are said to exhibit Hebbian learning. This method of learning is best expressed by this quote from the book:

When an axon of cell A is near enough to excite cell B and repeatedly or persistently takes part in firing it, some growth process or metabolic change takes place in one or both cells such that A’s efficiency, as one of the cells firing B, is increased

This is often paraphrased as “Neurons that fire together wire together.” It is commonly referred to as Hebb’s Law.

The combination of neurons which could be grouped together as one processing unit, Hebb referred to as “cell-assemblies”. And their combination of connections made up the ever-changing algorithm which dictated the brain’s response to stimuli.

Not only did Hebb’s model for the working of the mind influence how psychologists understood the processing of stimuli within the mind but also it opened up the way for the creation of computational machines that mimicked the biological processes of a living nervous system. And while the dominant form of synaptic transmission in the nervous system was later found to be chemical, modern artificial neural networks are still based on the transmission of signals via electrical impulses that Hebbian theory was first designed around.

photo credit: Hamed Saber

1. Get into a deep state of relaxation.
2. As you quieten your mind, travel back to the moment you were hurt.
3. Step out of that moment, and observe the situation as though you are a bystander (3rd position). This is Image A.
4. Imagine this image growing like a cancer inside you, the more you see further into the future. Feel the pain and bring it to Image A.
5. Clear your mind.
6. Travel to the time you had done wrong to someone who had forgiven you.
7. Notice the feeling of having been forgiven and anchor this.
8. Fire off the anchor then travel to the moment of Image A.
9. Consider the positive intention of the person who hurt/wronged you.
10. Transmit the sensation of forgiveness into the person in Image A.
11. Step into this new (forgiven) image A.
12. Step toward the future and notice a cleansing positive energy being released with each step.

photo credit: robclimbing

Contrary to popular belief, NLP has no formal roots in psychology. Richard Bandler, the founder of NLP, has also on several occasions disclaimed NLP’s position in psychology. The main reason for this is that the methodology is not psychological, but linguistic in nature.

NLP, based on its description at first glance appears to be a field within “neurolinguistics”. The definition of neurolinguistics by Wikipedia is “the study of the structures in the human brain that underlie grammar and communication”, which deviates from the original intent of NLP, which is the means to study the underlying representations within the mind in order to reconstruct behavior and turn such modeled behavior into permanent unconscious habit. Technically, it means that NLP should really not be just “neurolinguistic”, but really “neuro-psycholinguistic” in nature.

One of the main influencing theories that shaped NLP is the field of  General Semantics (not related to the main field of linguistics, developed by Alfred Korzybski.

Here’s what NLP does.

First, NLP studies three patterns of behavior: (1) physical, (2) linguistic and (3) cognitive (in Dilts, 1990, “Modeling With NLP). Physical modeling can be done by identifying patterns of physical behavior, sequence and structure. For example, one observe the processes of playing tennis and detect recurring patterns of physical behavior under differing circumstances.

Linguistic modeling requires one of observe sentence structure and patterns of behavior in speech and communication. Bandler and Grinder created something known as the Milton Model by observing the linguistic patterns of behavior of the clinical hypnotherapist, Milton H. Erickson. They also created another model called the Meta Model by observing the linguistic patterns of Fritz Perls, the developer of Gestalt Therapy, and Virginia Satir, the developer of the Satir Model of Family Therapy. It must therefore be noted that such models are merely a representation of reality, and NLP is the process to conduct such modeling.

Cognitive modeling in NLP itself was based on the models derived from Korzybski. Dilts utilized Korzybski’s processes in General Semantic theory to analyze how cognitive strategies are processed in four parts: (1) the trigger which is what kickstarts a cognitive strategy; (2) operations, the process within the strategy, (3) the test, which allows alternatives or contingencies in the event that a goal is not achieved, and (4) the exit, which tells an individual that the goal has been achieved.

photo credit: Ranoush.

I just read with some angst that yet another journalist has lumped NLP into the field of psychotherapy again. This is incorrect. NLP has its roots in linguistic modeling. It just so happened that Bandler and Grinder were formalizing NLP methods by looking at some linguistic models who happened to be psychotherapists because it seemed like they were doing something extraordinary.

If they were modeling chefs, you can’t say that NLP is about cooking. NLP is a science of modeling, but it happened to be modeling processes of things that have already been working. Psychiatrists have said that NLP is not scientifically valid, but that’s silly. NLP is not about scientific validation – it’s about modeling.

In fact, the process of anchoring comes from psychology, known as conditioning. If conditioning works, anchoring works. There’s tons of literature on behavioral conditioning.

There’s plenty of literature on the fast phobia cure, which is based on the psychological treatment in desensitization therapy. If desensitization therapy works, then the fast phobia cure works because it’s been modeled.

NLP was never meant to be simply a model for psychotherapy. It is a linguistic approach to understand what’s going on in the mind. So, newbies, please don’t lump NLP together with psychological testing. If you want to see the effects of NLP, then show me a target, and I’ll model it for you. This is what good master practitioners of NLP do. We will model results and figure out strategies to reach outcomes appropriate to the model.

However, psychotherapists who learn NLP find out that they are able to deepen their understanding of psychotherapy. Marketers who learn NLP are able to deepen their understanding of marketing. NLP puts into the hands of the average person, a way to model the blueprints of excellence. You use NLP methods for modeling and achieving similar results as others.

One clear example is in the area of Public speaking. For the longest time, I just could not understand why I didn’t win speech competitions. Then after I applied my modeling strategies, I discovered that there were certain things I had to do in order to jump through the hoops. From 1997 to 2002, I cracked the competitive speaking code and emerged champion for Evaluation Speeches. Using the same models, I taught others to win other international speech competitions.

NLP is about linguistics – understanding the representations in your mind. It spans many possible theories, which are highly accepted in the professional field of linguistics. Some of them come from the now defunct Transformational Grammar. Newer linguistic models (Gricean Pragmatics, Speech-Act Theory, Systemic Functional Grammar and other models in Pragmatics) will point the way to the achievement of more effective representations of the way the mind works.

To find out more about this, join my mailing list and I’ll update you when I’m running a real NLP certification training.

For example, if you want to make a million dollars, it will be evident that you are moving toward it when you see visual evidence of a credible source, such as a bank statement. This is a visual method of providing evidence.

Competence also requires evidence procedures. If you want to be recognized as a trainer for example, there are certain things that will convince people that you are a trainer. They will see, hear and feel it. Unfortunately it also means that if they don’t see it, even if you possess those qualities but don’t display it, you will not be deemed as competent. In order to be perceived as competent, you will need to figure it out by putting yourself into the appropriate positions to gauge if that evidence is sufficient. In other words, it may require a certain amount time (consistency) to assess an individual’s level of competence.

The word chunking comes from a famous 1956 paper by George A. Miller, The Magical Number Seven, Plus or Minus Two : Some Limits on our Capacity for Processing Information.

In NLP we have adopted the term “chunking” as a process of moving to details and specifics as “chunking down” versus “chunking up” which is a process of moving to abstractions and conceptualizations.

photo credit: PhotoDu.de

For instance, a starting concept like a “car” when chunked up will go into a higher abstraction called “transport” and can also chunk up toward “convenience”. If chunked down, “car” can be chunked to “brand” like BMW or Toyota. Subsequent chunking down can go into parts of the car.

The use of chunking is primarily for the purpose of getting different individuals to think at the same “chunk size”, because in mismatching chunks, we will end up breaking rapport due to a mismatch of our level of focus.

At the moment, the best way to utilize NLP techniques is to find a community of practice. All you need are three people to begin with and start off with a Practitioner licensing training program. (To be notified, just register on the top left signup box in my main page)

When you do pick up the skills and techniques, just remember that the most powerful medium is not the face-to-face medium, even though a lot of people can create maximum change through this method. The most powerful in the internet age is to do this in a conversational format without even having the need to touch an individual.

In other words, you need to have a series of practice sessions that hone your linguistic capabilities to their maximum, so you will be able to use that to leverage the change work you are expected to do for your clients.

I like to use Dilts’ SCORE model for the purposes of exploring a person’s issue. This is purely an interview, so you can extract some information about the way an issue has evolved and find the root cause of the problem.

S = Symptoms.

Identify what are current complaints and issues surrounding those complains.

C = root Cause.

Find out what the cause is and identify which level the cause is appearing at. Sometimes the cause is behavioral or a capability issue, but at other times it may be an identity issue.

O = Outcome.

Find out what the intended outcome is. Make sure you seek evidence procedures for the outcome.

R = Resources.

Check what kind of (inner) resources will be required for them to achieve their outcome. Then find ways to activate them.

E = Effect.

What is the long-term effect of the intervention? Are there any variables that are not useful or appropriate as a result of achieving this outcome?

Therefore, whenever you use the approaches in NLP, always make sure you apply them appropriately in a broader perspective.